Monday, July 5, 2010

Kobayashi Starved in Jail

World champion eater Takeru Kobayashi has been freed on bail after spending a harrowing and abusive night in a New York jail. We wrote yesterday that Kobayashi was arrested while trying to participate in Famous Nathan's Hot Dog Eating Contest. While world cried out for organizers to "let him eat!" he was shackled and hustled away.

The shameful treatment didn't end there. According to wire reports, Kobayashi was nearly starved to death during his jail time.

Kobayashi told reporters he had a sandwich and a glass of milk while being held.

"I am very hungry," he said. "I wish there were hot dogs in jail."

One sandwich? Let's do the math:

One sandwich = 1.2 hot dogs (conversely, 1 hot dog = 80% of one sandwich)
Last year, Kobayashi consumed 64.5 hot dogs in 10 minutes, thus eats 6.45 dogs/minute
6.45 x 0.8  =  5.16 sandwiches per minute
60 seconds ÷ 5.16 sandwiches = 11.6 seconds.

The six-time recipient of the Mustard Belt ate for a scant 11.6 seconds during his time in jail? This man once went jowl to jowl against a grizzly bear. He needs more than a skimpy sandwich to get through the night. I smell a lawsuit here.

This is how New York City's lawyers will feel once Kobayashi's attorneys are through with them.

No comments:

Post a Comment